New York Yankees Suck, They Always Have... They Always Will

Email Login
Password
	New users sign up!

(Enter the username and password above that you entered while signing up for email or the discussion board)

January 18, 2002
Scott Gleason
Yanks-Suck.Com

Acevedo

Okay, so it’s a bit of a tired refrain. The Yankees are ruining baseball. That said, as Peter Gammons writes that they’ll likely enter the $180-$200 million level this year, the next highest team being the Mets in the $115-$120 range, we see that they are certainly playing a different game. So, you might ask? Don’t they have to contribute money to other teams based on the luxury tax? Right you are. They will be forced to pay around 15% of the amount that they are over the threshold. The threshold is set at around $115 million. With the figures as they appear right now, it looks like the pinstripes will have to pay about $8-$9 million. It’s not exactly chump change, but it’s less than they’ll pay Roger Clemens this year. If they could shell out more than that figure for an unknown Cuban or an over-40 hurler, I don’t think they’ll rest uneasy paying it to the league office.

If you’d like to see the real indicator that the Yanks are the scourge of the earth, check their latest acquisition, Juan Acevedo. The 32 year-old right-hander was the Tigers closer last season. You read that correctly. He saved 28 games for Detroit and posted a 2.65 ERA. The Tigers didn’t have need for him with a couple of young arms ready to take the next step, but the Yankees have a couple holes to fill, right? Why not go out and sign this guy? There is no end to it. Why haven’t they signed Reggie Sanders yet? Rickey Henderson might be a good guy to have on the farm in case you need him late in the season.

This Friday, February 7th, my band, BenderX, heads to Don Hill’s in Manhattan. If you’ve read my stuff you may know that we have a song called “Yankees Suck.” Which we played our last time at Don Hill’s. We’d done it twice before and got nothing but gracious “we hate them too” responses. We were actually hoping for a little animosity, but I guess music and sports are mutually exclusive to most. That said, we play the Don Hill’s show and at the end of it the bartender gives me a “you’ve got a real ####ing nerve coming down here and playing that song. I’ve got a right to come over this bar and kick your ass.” My point in this story is that we’re playing the song again and you may never read another one of my columns again if this show goes badly. I need all the Yankee haters that I can get to be on my side and in attendance. This is a shameless attempt to get you to come see my band, sure, but what the hell. We’ll form an army and take Manhattan by storm.

Two other things of note: first, read the onion piece on the Yankees, it’s brilliant; and what’s up with Steinbrenner giving flack to Jeter? Hey George, that’s our job. We’re the ones that give flack to Derek, I stay up all night at raves because I like the way that men look at my abs, Jeter. Please. The next time that you have something to say about your matinee-idol shortstop, we’ll be all to happy to let you commission us to do the job. Until then, stick to doing what you do best: ruining baseball.

Scott Gleason, a former writer for RotoWire.com, shows his hatred of the New York Yankees through song with the band BenderX. Download their aptly titled song Yankees Suck.