Old Yankee Realted Articles
Gordon Edes Sets The Record Straight on Ortiz Vs. Jeter MVP Comments
It appears that people from New York are gullible idiots and the New York Post twists words around so they can sell more news papers to these morons.
David Ortiz, needless to say, is unhappy to hear about headlines like the one that appeared in today's NY Post, which read "Ortiz Disses Jeter," or the photo of him that appears in the USA Today with the caption that says he believes he should be MVP.
The reason he's upset is because he said nothing of the sort. I know, because I'm the reporter he talked to after Sunday's game, a conversation that began with me asking Ortiz what he thought his chances were of winning the MVP. He formed a big fat zero with his hand.
He then made the point that he felt the big boppers, the guys who drive in 120 and hit 40 or more, are more deserving of the MVP than a Derek Jeter -- who he stressed was having a great year -- because they do more for their team. He also said that if he hits 50 and knocks in 15-20 more runs than anybody else, he should still be considered a candidate, even if the Sox have fallen out of the race, citing the precedent of A-Rod winning for a last-place Texas team in 2002.
That has been twisted into Ortiz being selfish, Ortiz campaigning for himself, Ortiz putting down Jeter, ridiculous.
And of course, with the Sox headed for NYC this weekend, the circus will only continue
http://www.boston.com/sports/baseball/redsox/extras/extra_bases/2006/09/ortiz_catching.html
A-Rod Gets Benched By Torre
Update (July 17, 2006): In the 8th inning vs. the Seattle Mariners tonight, with the score 4-2 Yankees, Joe Torree benched Alex Rodriguez after he went 0 for 4 with 5 left on base, and commiting three errors during the game. A-rod was heavily booed by the "fans" at Yankee Stadium. More to come on this later.
Question About The Yankees
1) why do the Yankees players take so many curtain calls?
2) why do Yankee players give curtain calls when the fans aren't even loud? Who tells them to step out of the dugout and take off their hat? The manager? WHO?
3) why do Yankees players take curtian calls in the 5th inning in a 1-1 game in June?
If you are a Yankee fan and have an answer to these question please let me know. Thanks.
Yanks top Sox In Game Two but Fenway Still Let's The Yanks Have It
The Red Sox and Curt Schilling dominated Game 1 of the series, obviously. The Yankees managed to slip one through wakefeild in game 2 but that didn't silence the Fenway crowd from giving Gary Sheffield a, "YOU DID STEROIDS" chant in his first game back from the disabled list, which I'm sure got in his head enough to contribute to his 0-3 showing at the plate. More to come.
Damon's Return to Fenway: Part Two
The Yankees and Red Sox start another series tonight in Fenway Park. An update on the series will be posted in a day or two. In the meantime here's a little update from Baseball Prospectus of the Yankees who are wasting some of that $200 million dollar payroll with injuries:
"Some medical staffs go deep these days. Beyond the “normal” two trainers and team physician, now there’s usually a backup third trainer, a physical therapist, and a team of specialists and surgeons. Add in the occasional chiropractor, massage therapist and strength coach, and the staff gets sizeable. The Yankees need all that and more for all the injuries they have right now. Carl Pavano might be getting all the press, but his loss hurts less since he’s been gone so long. Pavano’s elbow “locked” during his rehab assignment. An MRI showed bone chips, so surgery was necessary. This is the best case of the various bad scenarios and gives Yankee fans the surgery they need to feel like Pavano’s been gone for a reason. Other pitchers have been back in as little as six weeks from this; by now, Pavano can’t be classified as a quick healer. Jorge Posada is still feeling the effects of getting run down at the plate. His back has been having intermittent spasms, preventing him from even DHing. The DL isn’t a probability now, though the timing of his missed games was awful. The outfield situation became even messier when Bubba Crosby strained his hamstring. He’ll be out the minimum while the team hopes that Gary Sheffield’s rehab assignment will be a short one. If he hits at Trenton, it could be one and done. Bernie Williams was unavailable as well, due to “tight buttocks.” OK, moving on... Shawn Chacon was finally put on the DL due to the severe bruise underneath his knee. He’ll miss the minimum with Aaron Small taking his spot in the rotation."
Also Hideki Matsui is out for the year with a broken wrist, and Johnny Damon, even though he is still in the lineup, is playing with a broken foot.
Matsui Breaks Wrist; RJ Continues to Struggle
Hideki Matsui broke his wrist in the series vs. the Red Sox and is out until Septemeber at the earliest, this certainly is not going to help the Yankees get out of second place (especially since the Yanks' ace RJ has a 5.13 ERA in 9 starts so far this season.)
DAMON'S RETURN TO FENWAY PARK
Greeted By Taunts And Boos, Damon Realizes His Mistake
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Johnny Damon made his first appearance in Fenway Park on Monday for the first time since signing with the Yankees and the Boston fans showed little mercy to the man who lied to and betrayed Red Sox nation. Batting leadoff, the game kicked off with the words "Now batting for the Yankees, number 18..." to which the Fenway crowd erupted with thunderous booing and a few scattered claps and cheers.
Damon did show a little class by tipping his helmet to the entire stadium which helped his cause a little bit and turned a couple boo's into cheers (however if I were a Yankee fan I would have been a bit upset with his gesture to the Sox fans.) but those scarce cheers completely disappeared later into the game as Johnny took a verbal beating from almost the entire stadium.
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The funniest part of the night was when Damon took center field in the bottom of the first and was greeted by fans throwing actual money onto the field in Damon's direction. Now THAT'S a classic Fenway Welcome.
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A lot of misinformed fans and players, both in Boston and in New York called this reaction by the crowd "disgraceful" and "unwarranted," however this is not the case. Take Damon's quote for example: 'There are not many teams who fail to pursue their most popular players or their better players," Damon told the New York Daily News before last night's rainout. 'I know the Yankees would never do that. If Derek Jeter's [contract is] up, if Bernie Williams is up, they're going to keep them.'
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Oh so the Red Sox didn't try to keep you than, huh Johnny? Well let's look at the
situation. The Red sox rewarded Captain Jason Varitek a $10 million dollar per year deal.
The Red Sox also recently rewarded MVP contender David Ortiz with a $12.5 million dollar per year contract. Both players gladly accepted. When Damon became a free agent the Red Sox
offered a $40 million dollar, 4-year deal (or $10 million per year.) Both Varitek and Ortiz
have been infinitely more valuable to the Red Sox than Damon has proven himself to be. The
Red sox thought he was not worth anymore than $10 million dollars which they offered him
and he declined without second thought. He wanted more and lied about it by saying "There's
no way I can go play for the Yankees, but I know they're going to come after me hard. It's
definitely not the most important thing to go out there for the top dollar, which the
Yankees are going to offer me. It's just not what I need." at which point Damon turned down
a rumored $14.5 million dollar offer from the Detroit Tigers so he could take the $13
million dollar contract the Yankees offered him, which he signed very promptly after it was
offered. Also on that comment about the contract Bernie Williams received, look how that
worked out for the Yankees. He's now a backup outfeilder with slightly better numbers than
Red Sox light-hitting short stop Alex Gonzalez and he makes $13 million dollars a year.
Joe Torre also decided to throw his stupid opinion out there too by saying: “I was a
little disappointed in the reaction by the fans. I guess we should feel proud. Evidently
wearing a Yankee uniform overrides winning a World Series and busting your tail for years.
Without Johnny here, they may have been working on 89 or 90 years [without a championship].
It’s too bad they don’t appreciate that more so than they dislike the fact that he’s
wearing our uniform.”
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David Wells scored some Brownie points with Red Sox nation by being the first person to
publicly comment about Torre's remarks: "Aw, poor Joe. Joe has been around a long time. I
guess Joe is getting too sensitive." mocked Wells. Wells of all people would know about
this situation the best. As any person with a memory recalls, 'Boomer' was the Yankees best
pitcher for several years, he helped them win some championships, and even pitched a
perfect game for them once.
When Wells signed with the San Diego Padres he made his return to Yankee stadium, and the
Yankee crowd welcomed him with open arms for all he contributed. Then Wells signed with the
Yankees rivals last year, the Boston Red Sox. |
stupid.
When he made his debut in a Red Sox uniform
for the first time at Yankee stadium, guess how the fans reacted.
THEY BOOED HIM
MERCILESSLY! I honestly cannot figure out if Yankee fans are giant hypocrites or Just plain stupid.
Now, Ok, so let's talk about fan appreciation for a minute Joe. Do you realize that Yankee
fans, the supposed best fans in the world, are the SAME fans who once booed Derek Jeter one
year because he was off to a slow start? (on an un-related note, yesterday the results came
out of a Sports Illustrated Poll that surveyed 470 Major League players that asked the
question "who is the most over-rated player in Major League Baseball? Jeter ranked #1 on
the list, Alex Rodriguez came in third :)
Anyways, the Red Sox ended up killing the Yankees 7-3 on the day of the return of Damon to Yankee stadium and Doug Mirabelli to a Red Sox uniform, mostly by the help of a David Ortiz monster home run into the Sox bullpen on a night when the wind gusts were blowing violently in the opposite direction. The depressed look on Damon’s face was priceless and he moped back into the dugout with his new teammates but despite how much he pisses me off and how greedy he is, I still couldn’t help but feel a little bad for him. I’m sure he now realizes the huge mistake he made that will haunt him for the rest of his life.
Be sure to check out our new line of anti-Yankee (and anti-Damon) shirts in our store:
A Funny Video Clip Of Alex Rodriguez
Click here
Randy Johnson Is A Dead-beat Dad
After Rj got someone pregnant he left her right before his daughter was born. Aparently he hasn't been able to find any extra cash in his $127 million dollar bank account to pay the child support. His daughter can't even bring herself to watch her famous dad pitch on TV anymore.
Another Lawsuit From the Yankees
This time it's not against us, but instead against the creator of the 'Yankee Hater' hats which are available in our store.
Torre relieved Wang feels fine
Even though this is good news for the Yankees, it's the funiest headline for an article I've ever seen :)
A-Rod Leads The World Baseball Classic In The Category of 'Being Fabulous'
Damon Can't Keep His Mouth Shut, Goes On Date With Steinbrenner
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So I’m sure most of you have heard some of the crap that has been falling out into the media from the sh*t eating grin on Johnny Damon’s face lately. You’d think he’d have just the slightest bit of dignity and accept the fact that he is a greedy bastard and just keep his mouth shut while admiring his new fat wallet, but that’d be giving him too much credit apparently. Those of you in the NY area who get the YES channel might have seen the new station promos starring Damon, in which he says “Only on YES! Not on NESN!” What is that? Brilliant advertising you arrogant chumps… totally uncalled for.
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Damon’s got a new style too, not only did he lose the long hair (which Steinbrenner forced him to do) but he took it a step further and got blonde highlights too! He has made the complete transformation from idiot caveman to retarded metro sexual (though he claims he is not retarded, or as he so elegantly put it “I can be an idiot, but not stupid." whatever the hell that means, but anyone who has read more than two sentences from his book will vouch for the fact that he is indeed, mentally slow.)
Damon also had a couple more comments to add about boston recently, such as “They just never really made a strong attempt to keep me." (referring to the 40 million dollar contract offer that he turned down) but of all the stupid crap he has been blurting out, I found this comment to be by far, the funniest:
"Manny really wants out of Boston, just so he can relax and chill," Damon told Kay. "If he played for the Mets, he probably wouldn't be able to chill much. But I think the Yankees would be a perfect fit for him, as well as for David Ortiz."
WHAT!?!? What a stupid f!@king thing to say! So not only does Damon think that David Ortiz should leave Boston and breech his contract with the Red Sox for no apparent reason, but he also thinks that Manny will be able to “relax and chill” in New York because the Bronx (or as some call it, “Satan’s Asshole”) is a lot more of a relaxing place to be than Boston.
After being interviewed, Damon also went on a little date with George Steinbrenner which you can read about here.
You can read more about the special caveman’s theory on baseball in this NY Times article, and also Eric Wilbur of the Boston Globe wrote a good article about Damon’s NY shenanigans called Johnny Big Appleseed that I would recommend reading.
Also, Valentine's Day is coming Sox fans! Our thongs are at a special $9.99 price for a limited time, be sure to check out the rest of our extensive collection of sox gear too that would make a great gift (we now have new COCO CRISP shirts to celebrate our replacing Johnny Damon in center Feild!) And remeber, Every order of $50 or More Will Receive a Free Red Sox 3 Pack of Wristbands!
TRAITOR
"There's no way I can go play for the Yankees, but I know they're going to come after me hard. It's definitely not the most important thing to go out there for the top dollar, which the Yankees are going to offer me. It's just not what I need."
--- ex-Red Sox Johnny Damon, to MLB.com, May 3, 2005
Sox Fans Feel Betrayed
It’s a sad day for the people of Boston and all across America; Johnny Damon has signed a 4-year, $52 million dollar contract with the New York Yankees. Of course this is a complete kick to the gonads for the Red Sox, but honestly Damon is not worth a 4 year $52 million dollar deal at this point in his career (he is 32 years old and obviously not what he used to be). It’s sad to see him go, and most in Boston would have supported him throughout the remainder of his career… if he had chosen any team except the Yankees. He will always be remembered as one of the members of the curse breaking team of ’04 in Boston, but this decision defiantly hindered his legacy around here.
Anyway, on the other side of it, the Yankees, whose organization lost close to $100 million last year, just gave away yet another ridiculous contract to an undeserving player. Yes their lineup is fierce right now with Damon’s addition, but as the saying goes “pitching wins championships” and the Yankees still don’t have it.
Here is BaseballProspectus.Com's take on the signing:
"Despite all the attention paid to him, however, Damon is not a superstar, or arguably even a star. He was a consistent five-to-six win player in his four years with the Red Sox, a period that covered his age-28 through age-31 seasons. Durability and consistency were his strong suits, rather than any particular element of his game, and he does have fairly good speed. His peak season, 2004, featured a .304/.380/.477 line and 6.7 WARP, notable as much for how it ended--in a Red Sox championship--as for its value. Damon looks like a lesser version of the center feilder the Yankees recently became so disenchanted with. At 31, Bernie Williams hit .307/.391/.566 and posted a 6.7 WARP in the second year of his seven-year contract. He would decline in a straight line from that point, especially on defense, to become a shell of his former self at 34 and 35.
Damon has an significant speed edge on Williams, and is unlikely to decline as sharply on defense as Williams did (few players have). Neither player has a good arm; Damon is one of the few replacements for Williams the Yankees could have acquired who doesn’t provide much of an upgrade in their center-field throwing. Damon, like Nomar Garciaparra, got a big boost from Fenway Park, on the order of 50 points of batting average and OBP the last three seasons. The Yankees aren’t really getting a .310/.370/.450 guy so much as they’re getting a .285/.345/.425 guy. It’s the difference between a star and a solution, or millions of dollars and a couple of wins a year."
Also, Johnny Damon's Soul is available for auction on eBay :)
Yankee Holiday-Time News
The Yankees haven’t made any big splashes yet in the off-season, perhaps the reason why is because the Yankees lost between $50 and $85 million dollars last season! Oh who would have thought that a team with a $200 million dollar payroll who gets eliminated from the post-season in the first round could actually lose money? The funniest part of the Yankees losing so much money is that they might soon have to pay even more! According to the report, the Yankees may have undervalued their television rights (they charge the YES network $60 million a year to broadcast Yankee games.) If it is found that they did undervalue the rights, they will have to pay to make up the difference.
In other news, the Yankees have decided to not let Jorge Posada to play in the Baseball World Classic because they think the 34 year old catcher is not durable enough to do it (which may be evident by his .262 batting average, and his .782 OPS, which was over 100 points lower than the previous year). Don’t worry George, just one more year and $13.5 million left on this no offense/no defense catcher.
Speaking of the World Classic, Slappy Rodriguez has decided that he wants to play for the Dominican Team. Hey Alex, you were born in New York City, I don’t know if you realized this, but that’s in the United States, not the Dominican Republic….
Lastly, Bob Kapisch just wrote an article worth reading about why the Mets are now the best team in New York.
Yankees Own Three of The Worst Contracts in Baseball for 2006
News has been slow in Yankee land thus far in the offseason, and most are nervous that the Boss is on the verge of something incredibly stupid to retaliate the Red Sox acquisition of ace Josh Beckett. Anyway, all-baseball.com has written a good article that explains the 13 worst contracts in baseball. Guess who has 3 of those 13? That's right, the spanks. Click here to read about why the Yankees are retarded for handing out $54 million dollars to Mike Mussina, Derek Jeter and Jason Giambi next season.
Hideki Matsui Is Addicted to Pornography Indeed, his only eccentricity, if it can be called that, is his extensive private library of adult videos. His refreshing ability to laugh self-deprecatingly about his porno collection, reporters say, is one reason why fans and even nonfans have taken to him so much. Says former reporter Isao Hirooka: "Hideki just wants to be like ordinary people." -Time Magazine
Off season Has Begun, Yankees Continue to Embarrass Themselves Even After First-round EliminationSo, the Yankees were once again eliminated in the first round with a new record breaking salary and the White Sox went on to win their first World Series since 1917. However, the Onion is reporting that Fox is asking the White Sox to play one more series against the Yankees for the “Real World Championship.”  | | Ozzie Guillen Seems ecstatic after winning the World Series | In recent Yankee news, Slappy Rodriguez apparently has a gambling problem, and was yelled at by Steinbrenner to avoid illegal poker clubs. ESPN’s Page 2 made a great interactive feature that will literally bring you inside the mind of Rodriguez and show you what he’s been thinking about for the last few weeks. Also, Matt Lawton just tested positive for steroids, which means AT LEAST three people in the Yankee lineup have been on steroids. Now this is just absolutely ridiculous, their payroll is 220 million dollars, they’re all on steroids, and they still get eliminated in the first round of the playoffs. My God, MLB should make a new rule that requires the entire Yankee clubhouse to get tested at least on a weekly basis.And Last, a reader of our site recently sent this short article about a recent encounter she had with Alex Rodriguez, and goes into detail about why he is such an ass-hole. It’s a good read.
Gear Up For Playoffs; Yankees Upset With RangersUpdatesBe sure you check out our store which has all sorts of merchandise to prepare for the upcoming Sox-Yanks series down the strethc! Everything from mens and womens shirts and apparel, hats, flags, banners, stickers, posters, baby clothing, and bracelets!!!!
And in recent news the Yanks are upset with former Yankee skipper Buck Showalter for pulling his starters in the third inning of Sunday's game while the Rangers had a 4-1 lead over the Angels, the Angels then rallied for a 7-4 victory which resulted in the Yankees not getting home field advantage in the ALDS. This is very entertaining to me, becuase all the Yankees had to do was win one more game and they would have earned home field advantage, but they failed to do so, SO THEY BLAMED THE RANGERS?! If you click the link and read the article, you will see my favorite part which ironically includes "code of honor" and "Alex Rodriguez" in the same sentence.
Small Unit Apologizes for Being an Idiot
Also, you may have seen how Randy Johnson got ejected for yelling out of control at an umpire the other day when he didn’t agree with a pitch call and almost cost the Yankee their game. "I was wrong," he said. "I was wrong for letting my emotions get away from me." Then after saying he was wrong, he decided to go the other way with his apology and redirect the blame because “he didn’t think he got a fair warning” for the first call he tried to argue earlier in the game.
“It's not the first time I've questioned an umpire, but it is the first time in 17 years that I have been ejected for it," Johnson said. "It came at an unfortunate time."
 Hey Randy, YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO ARGUE BALLS AND STRIKES. You get an automatic ejection for it. I’m sorry if you think that you have special rules that apply only to you, but that’s the rules of baseball. You’d think after 17 years of playing professional baseball you would have picked up on that rule. Joe Torre had something to say to Johnson after his incident: “I thought you snapped," Torre said.
And in other Yankee Sucking news, Sheffield is no longer going to be playing right field (because of a leg injury) instead the Ruben Sierra and his lightning-fast cat-like defensive skills will take over the duties out there while Gary DH’s.
Wells Hates Yankee Fans''I've lost all respect for New York fans,'' Boomer says. ''New York is my city. I love it. But to get the `(Bleep) you, mother-(bleeper)' from the fans? I've washed my hands of them. Of all people, I would never expect them to do that.'' - David Wells.
Yankees Close To Signing Ruben Rivera (The Theif) ""It is something I will probably do," said Yankee GM Brian Cashman. That's right, Ruben Rivera. Mariano Rivera's cousin. You may remeber him as the guy who got kicked off of the Yankees a couple of years ago for stealing Derek Jeter's glove and trying to sell it to a memorablia dealer for some extra cash. Or perhaps you've heard the story of him being in a sexual relationship with Mr. Paul Priore, who sued the Yankees a couple of years back for sexual harassment. Now reguardless of these two things (which are each extremely hilarious in their own way) what I find to be even FUNNIER is the fact that a $200 million dollar baseball team is pulling never-has-beens out of the Mexican League in the middle of a pennant race! HA HA HA! Good luck Yanks.
Torre's Job Security Is Not CertainBefore the Yankee's game yesterday against the Rangers, Steinbrenner was approached and asked whether or not Joe Torre's job was safe. George only replied with, "I have nothing to say." After the game was over Steinbrenner was approached once again and he refused to comment.Steinbrenner's comments came two days after he had questioned Torre's managerial decisions in Tuesday's loss to the White Sox.
Boss Very Upset That The Highest Paid Team in MLB History Absolutely Sucks"I am nervous about the whole team," states George Steinbrenner, and why shouldn't he be? $3,432,307 per win is what the Yankees are paying this year for their 60-51 record, which at this point gives them a 41.5% chance of making the postseason according to Baseball Prospectus. It would be the first time in 12 years that they would have not been playing in October. And why is this happening? Most would think that their best players being juiced up on steroids would be enough to make up for the fact that they wasted $63 million dollars on Pavano, Wright and Womack, right? Or who would have thought that the fact that their center fielder and best Starting pitcher are both almost eligible for senior citizen discounts at Burger King would be a problem?  | | A depressed Yankee fan tries to commit suicide over the Yankees dismay, but is too stupid to do it properly. | Perhaps it's just the fact that almost everyone in the entire Yankees organizations hates each other? Dayn Perry has analyzed the situation in a bit more depth in a very good article published on Fox Sports, which touches upon the stupidity of the Yankee management for giving ridiculous amounts of money to Carl Pavano, who has been nothign but medicore this season and is likly to miss the rest of the season with a shoulder injury, Jared Wright who nobody has heard from since April, and Tony Womack who has a .273 On-Base-Percentage (and Red sox fans think Mark Bellhorn is bad?)
Also, here is a picture of Alex Rodriguez sliding into Michael Young like a bitch in yesterday's game. Wow A-rod, you really are a class act!
Idiot Yankee Fan Punches Podsednik In The Face Ok, so one guy (Chris House) in Fenway Park accidently touches Sheffield in the face a few weeks ago when he tried to go get a ball in the stands, and Gary he throws a roid-rage hissy fit because someone brushed against his fragile little face, and it becomes front page news around the country and Red Sox fans are labled as "jerks." Now this friggen moron CLEARLY clocks Podsednik right in the face and everyone is saying "oh it's an accident" and no one even cares? Are you kidding me? If you watch the replay, there was no one this guy was reaching for the ball, he PUNCHED PODSEDNIK! Sweet Jesus. By the way, Podsednik did not freak out after getting punches, unlike some players on the Yankees (who may or may not be on steroids) who have freaked out for less.
Sheffield Hates the YankeesOh yes, the always-hilarious Gary Sheffield is running his mouth again... who saw that coming? Sheffield, who apparently, "ain't tryin' to get no Pepsi commercial," recently blasted Jeter and Slappy because they "ain't the real leaders of (the) team" and he "ain't going to say who it is, but (he) know who it is."Aside from criticizing the team's so-called leader, Gary also chimed in a few words about the organization itself, saying they lack respect for family: "It's not a family-oriented team. In L.A., wives can fly on the plane; with the Yankees they can't, With other teams, the wives always have functions to bring them together. Not here." These are quite confusing comments made from a man who started freaking out a couple weeks ago about a rumor that he was being traded, saying that he would make a full effort on other teams, but he did make it clear what he would do if he had the opportunity to make a Jeter-styled diving catch into the stands even while playing for the Yankees: "That's not happening."
Gary Afraid of Losing Yankee Cap, Boyfriend JeterGary Sheffield, The $39 million dollar steroid-hemorrhoid who plays in right field for the Yankees got a little bit touchy when asked to comment about a trade rumor involving him and Mets outfielder Mike Cameron. "I would go play for them. It doesn't mean I'm going to be happy playing there. And if I'm unhappy, you don't want me on your team. It's just that simple. I'll make that known to anyone... If I'm not happy, you don't want me on your team, period," Sheffield said. "That's just the way it goes. That's life. I have to deal with what they dish out, they got to deal with what I dish out, period. That's just the way it's going to be.""I'll ask for everything," he said. "Everything. You're going to inconvenience me, I'm going to inconvenience every situation there is," Gary added. He also went on to make some other ridiculous comments about how he is not being paid enough money to be a team leader, etc. Let me just say this: Sheffield, you are one selfish unprofessional prick. This makes you wonder why the Yanks would even want to consider getting rid of a player batting .300 with 55 RBI's, obviously there is some clubhouse turmoil going on here. So I hope that Gary gets his wish and stays with the Yankees. I'm completely happy with whatever team chemistry they have that is responsible for their slightly-over .500 record (which has them only above Tampa Bay in the standings.) Oh, and happy anniversary Gary and Derek.Wow, the Yankees are in the bottom half of the American League standings, no one (including them) wants any of their players, and Steinbrenner is finally giving up. What a year it's been!
Yanks Off to 11-16 Start; All is Good In Yankee Hating Land
 Who would have thought that a $200 million dollar team could really suck so much? For those of you not aware, the Yankee's current winning percentage is .407, and it is a close battle between the Yanks and the Devil Rays for the coveted title of "LAST PLACE" in the AL East. Bernie Williams can't play anymore, Giambi and his pet intestinal parasite is hitting .217, Kevin Brown's ERA is 8.25, injuries are finally setting in on Randy Johnson (will miss his next start with a groin injury) and the Yankees are relying on two minor leaguers (Sean Henn and Chien-Ming Wang) to help them avoid being swept by the Devil Rays this week. Bob Klapisch has written an excellent article about how Injuries and age are finally catching up to Yankees. If you are a concerned Yankee fan, maybe you have some suggestions on how the Yankees could fix their team. PAGE2 has made out a handy little form that you can fill out to help solve the Yankees' problems! Click Here to check it out.Also, Buster Olney just wrote a great book called Epilogue: 'The Last Night of the Yankee Dynasty'. The book picks up the story following the Yankees' 3-2 loss to the Diamondbacks in Game 7 of the 2001 World Series, the last game played in pinstripes for Paul O'Neill, Scott Brosius and Chuck Knoblauch. Click the link above to read an exceprt with a link to purchase the book.
Red Sox Get Their World Championship Rings; Beat Yankees 8-1 The Red Sox finally got their first World Championship flag in 86 years on Monday at Fenway Park and the Yankees were there to watch the whole thing. It was a wonderful day for all, many past and present Sox greats were at hand to witness the event as well, and the Yankees were nothing but classy the whole time. Possibly the funniest event of the day was when the Yankee lineup was being announced, and of course all the players were booed EXCEPT Mariano Rivera who got possibly the biggest applause of the day! He even thought it was funny as he started laughing. The Red Sox then proceeded to spank the Yankees in an 8-1 victory for their 2005 home opener.Also, you may have seen the “Speedstick” deodorant commercial featuring Alex Rodriguez, what you may not have noticed is at the end of the commercial, E5 (for those of you not familiar with baseball scoring, that means a third baseman error) appears right in the middle of the screen! Take a look:
Yankees Choke Again in 9th, Sox Are Rivera's DaddyThe 2005 season officially started Sunday with a matchup between the Sox and the Spanks... NY took round one of this three game series but anyone with half a brain knows that game doesn't mean much of anything and I don't think many people expected Wells to beat Johnson (that will likly be a different scenario later in the year, when Johnson (AKA: Rat Boy) no longer can bend his 42 year-old knees.Also you may have notcied that Giambi (a known steroid abusing freak, cheater and disgrace to the game of baseball) and his pet intestinal parasite got a lovely standing ovation from the wonderful fans at Yankee stadium. I'm actually not quite sure why they were so estatic about a guy who is basically stealing money from their team and giving their crappy city an even worse worse name for itself. Oddly enough, dispite all the steroid things and the fact that he only has one hit this season, he still got the standing ovation. Meanwhile, Rivera, (who happens to be one of a very select few Yankees who is not totally dispised by the rest of the country and has some ounce of dignity left in him) was BOOED BY YANKEE FANS after the blown save in game three of the series. Hey Rivera, I think Boston can fit you somewhere in their bullpen if you ever get fed up with idiotic Yankee fans. But in related semi-news, Bill Simmons just wrote a hilarious article about the Secret Yankee Closer Election Set for April 8. Now here's a picture of Jeter getting beaned in the head:
The Devil Wears Pinstripes ESPN writer and infamous Yankee Hater Jim Caple just came out with a new book titled The Devil Wears Pinstripes The book features things like:
A franchise timeline (Oct. 16, 2004: Steinbrenner celebrates the Yankees’ 19-8 victory over the Red Sox in Game 3 of the ALCS by hanging a banner that reads “Mission Accomplished’’).
The 10 Yankees who drive us nuts!
The 10 greatest moments in Yankees-hating history.
An examination of the differences between New York and Boston fans.
Blueprints to Rudy Giuliani’s proposed Yankees World.
A look at the Steinbrenner money machine.
An explanation of why, despite how insane the Yankees make us, we still need them. Much in the way ''Casablanca'' needed the Nazis.Click here to read his latest article on ESPN's Page 2, which includes a link to where you can purchase his book.In other news, the Yanks and Sox saw eachother for the first time of the year today in a grapefruit league exhibition game... nothing of importance happened, but Giambi went 2-for-5 in New York's 9-2 win, leaving him with a .250 average (3-for-12) with two RBI. Giambi was quoted with this after the game:
"For the critics, it's always nice," Giambi said. "A lot of the hard work paid off tonight."
Hey, idiot... it's March... these games don't count. What paid off?? that you have three hits in Spring Training?! Do you realize that you make over $12 million dollars a year? Yeah you must have worked real hard to be able to claim that you hit a home run off a single-A pitcher who probably won't even play in the major leagues for years... and you did it without steroids too! Oh wow these critical March Matchups are exciting.I was also recently made aware of an article which was actually published about a month ago in the Washington Post, but it is an extremly good piece written on the Yankee's financial situation:
Excerpt: "There's a real rude awakening coming for them," said one high-ranking official from another team, who like others interviewed for this story spoke on condition of anonymity. Referring to Yankees owner George Steinbrenner, the official said, "Starting in 2006 [when the debt service rule goes into full effect following a three-year grace period], he won't be able to fund these $200 million payrolls any more."
Click here to read the full story.Also a message to Yankee Fans: You're GM is a Red Sox fan!
Class-less Yankee Fan tries to rename the Fleet Center as 'Derek Jeter Center'"All names have to be rated 'G'. We determined that Derek Jeter Center is an obscene and vulgar use of the English language in Boston," FleetCenter president and CEO Richard Krezwick joked. The Yankee fan,a Manhatten lawyer named Kerry Konrad won a bid on eBAY this week for the amount of $2,325 which gave him one-day naming rights to the Fleet center. However after his proposal was rejected, a Boston friend of his donated an additional $6,275 to the charitable fund and the two of them agreed to on the name, "Jimmy Fund Center." Click here to read more.Also, Theo Epstein was recently on the Mike and Mad Dog show in NY, in which he discussed Slappy and the media war, amoung other things. I would reccomend you listen to it.
Ask Stupid Questions, Print Distorted Answers
What's this? A writer (and one of the most respected ones in all of NY) of the Yankee fan gospel known as NY Times has decided to call out the NY media on writing stupid articles out of context, and actually SIDE with Boston on this little verbal feud between the Red Sox and the Yanks. Click here if you don't believe me.Also, Yankees team chemistry has been running very smoothly lately (just kidding, haha)... as you probably heard Sheffield called out Jason Giambi on his steroid use. Now the really funny thing here is not that Giambi's teammates are upset about him using steroids, but Sheffield admitted to using steroids himself not more than six months ago! I'm pretty sure that's the exact definition of hypocrite/idiot.And in another Giambi related story, Steinbrenner exploded for the first time this year (it's not even March yet :) with some choice words for Jason Gimabi's agent Arn Tellem and the way he has handled the whole BALCO situation... "F@#K the agent... he's no good."
A-Rod Still Sucks!Also, Gay-Rod was caught running his mouth again recently, you need an account to view that article so I will give you the summary:
"I know there are 650 or 700 other players who are sleeping this morning," A-Rod said. "Either that, or they're taking their kids to school. But there's no way they're going to be up running the stairs or doing what I'm doing."
"Rodriguez admits, "I could coast and no one would know the difference." Instead, he's in the gym because of a gap he feels is so obvious - a wide, unmerciful gulf between those Cooperstown skills and the perception that Rodriguez was one of the reasons the Yankees were humiliated by the Red Sox in the playoffs.
"This is still Jeter's team because he's the captain, but my approach is not to be everyone's best friend," Rodriguez said. "My approach is to win championships. The only way to do that is to be myself, and to take care of my world. With my talent people will follow naturally."
It's not the first time A-Rod has issued a blanket mea culpa, but he knows words won't soften the memory of him slapping the ball out of Bronson Arroyo's glove in the eighth inning of Game 6. Rodriguez still says it was a "smart play, one I would make again"Ok, maybe it's just me, but Alex seems a little bit full of himself... wait no, if I may correct myself: HE'S GONE COMPLETELY INSANE. Seriously, just read that little section of the article a few more times to yourself if you didn’t quite take that all in. So, not only is he the only player who’s capable of bringing a championship back to NY, but he is also apparently off living in his own little “A-Rod World”, a world which the rest of Earth is not a part of I guess? AND SLAPPING THE BALL OUT OF SOMEONE’S HAND IS A “SMART PLAY”?!?! First of all why would someone do that in the first place? Then CELEBRATE as if he had just done something totally awesome, THEN try to ARGUE THE CALL and claim that he would do it again (despite the fact that him doing that cost the Yankees a base, and probably the game; if they had any chance in Hell of winning to begin with.) My head hurts.
RJ Makes Great First Impression in NY
 "Don't get in my face... I don't care who you are... and don't talk back to me," said a friendly Randy Johnson to a CBS cameraman as he slapped the camera out of his hands. But Johnson (being the kind hearted fellow that he is) thought his introduction to the city of New York may have come off as a bit rude, so he later stated, "I hope that everyone will understand that the past few days have been a bit overwhelming and I wish I had handled the situation differently." Well it looks like the Yankees just gave a ridiculous contract to a very mentally stable person. After all he just made more money than I will ever see in my lifetime, he has every right to be angry and lash out at the media. Click here to read the storyOh and here's something I never thought I would see:
The Yankees declined to sign Carlos Beltran for six years, $99.6 million because they could not afford another expensive, long-term deal.
-SI.COM So the Yankees have a payroll limit... Did hell freeze over last night?
Yankees Trying Hard to Cheat... and Failing
So this week the Yankees went out and spent $46 million dollars on a 41-year-old pitcher (who will be 44 by the time his contract with the Yankees is done) with no cartilage in his right knee and had a 6-8 record with a 4.26 ERA just a year ago. I'm not about to shed a tear over this, in fact I think it's quite funny that on opening day four months from now they will have a $207 million dollar payroll. No that's not a typo.. two-hundred and seven million dollars. You'd think a payroll like that would get you at least one robotic super man on your roster capable of hitting 700 foot home runs on command. But the Yankees opted to go for the "aged like a not-so-fine wine" theme this year. This season 19 players on their 25 man roster will be over 30 years old. 13 of those players were born in the 1960's!But the Yankees didn't stop at Randy Johnson while trying to build a make-shift retirement home in their clubhouse, they decided to bring back Ruben Sierra and Tino Martinez! Watch out pitchers of the American League, these guys can't use steroids anymore so if you hit them with pitch you might shatter their tibia or something, then you'll have a lawsuit on your hands (and I can confirm, the Yankees aren't afraid to send a team of lawyers after you for miniscule reasons, such as saying the word "Yankees" in public without written expressed legal permission). Oh yeah, read this article by Jayson Stark, it's funny.
Giambi Admits to Steroid Use!
This is off off the Ap wire... so not only is Jason Giambi a cheating pansy and an insult to baseball all together, but he's also a big fat liar too! Accordding to a public to a public statement released today by the San Fransisco Chronicle , "Giambi described how he injected human growth hormone in his stomach, testosterone into his buttocks, rubbed an undetectable steroid knows as "the cream" on his body and placed drops of another, called "the clear," under his tongue. Aparently he was getting them from Barry Bond's personal trainer (oh what a surprise!) along with Gary Sheffield, who aimitted this year that he used "the cream" and "the clear" from BALCO, which he said "unknowingly" to him contained illegal steroids... though I'm pretty sure if you asked an average 7-year-old baseball fan what a steroid is, he'll tell you without hesitation that it's something athletes use to cheat and/or make their testicles smaller. But innoncent Gary aparently was not aware of this. So who was right all along? That's right, ME, you ignorant Yankee idiots. In other news, The Yankees are also no longer persueing Randy Johnson becuase Steinbrenner's bottomless pockets are suddenly no longer bottmless for some reason. What a wonderful day in Yankee Hating land, huh?
Updates in the Yankee Hating World
The world has had a good month now to take in the Red Sox world championship, but the Yankee hating hasn't stopped.First, I would like everyone tot ake a look at this FLASH ANIMATION commemorating the victory (you may remeber the flash awesome animations this person has produced in past seasons). If you are a Yankee fan and after watching that you consider coming over to the Red Sox side, we have provided you with this CONVERSION APPLICATION that you may fill out in order to be reviewed for membership into the Red Sox fan club. In other news, someone has been stenciling Johnny Damon pictures all over New York street lamps, and it's driving the folks in Brooklyn insane. "Breaking the Curse is still no excuse for defacing public property," fumed Brooklyn Borough resident Marty Markowitz, who has aparently never seen grafiti in all of his years living in New York.Oh and last, but certainly not least, someone tried to extort Gary Sheffield this week WITH VIDEO TAPES OF HIS WIFE HAVING SEX WITH R. KELLEY!!!! I wonder if he peed on her! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA. Oh man, people in the bleachers at Fenway are going to have a field day with this next season. Click here to see the story.
HOLY CRAP!!!! RED SOX ARE WORLD CHAMPIONS!!!!
Take that "1918" phrase and shove it up your ass New York! Congratulations Boston!
ELIMINATION: Sox Accomplish Greatest Comeback in Baseball History!
 "They're a walking disaster. They act like they're tough, how they care so much about winning, but it's all a front. They're just a bunch of characters." - Gary Sheffield. Hey Gary, why don’t you put that statement in your steroid needle and inject it right up your ass! Oh yes, today is a great day in Boston history as the Red Sox embarrassed the Yankees in a 10-3 victory last night that advances them to the World Series. So Steinbrenner, when you read this I would just like to congratulate you on a well played season, I mean considering your team’s salary is only $180+ million second place really isn’t that bad. I mean you made it all the way to the ALCS! I mean you were just ONE game away from winning the pennant on FOUR different occasions during the series. And hats need to go off to the Yankee players, Mariano Rivera saved half of his save opportunities that‘s not completely horrible (hey Rivera, WHO‘S YOUR DADDY?) Jeter was outstanding in the ALCS as well, he only made 3 errors in 29 plays that he made… that’s a .957 fielding percentage! Jeter was definitely the 3rd best short stop on the field this series. Oh and then there ‘ole Whore-hey Posada, what can be said about the way he handles a “staff” and he had no trouble at all holding on to all those “balls” during the year.  So George, it’s official now that your Yankees are #2, but for what it’s worth I’ve been telling people that you’re “a piece of #2” for years now. May I suggest raising the payroll to $200 mill. next season? Maybe with that kind of money you might actually be able to win something. Oh and when you fire Brian Cashman tell him I said, “nice job and thanks for assembling a team full of choke artists!” I just have one question for you though, when you raised the banner above the Yankee dugout after game 3 that said “Mission Accomplished” what exactly was that referring to? Was the mission to make baseball history by accomplishing the greatest choke ever? Well if it was, then good job! Have fun this fall playing golf while the Red Sox are competing for a world championship. GO SOX!
Schilling is the Man! A-Rod is a Girl!
 The Red Sox have come back to bring the series to a game 7 in the greatest ALCS comeback in the history of baseball! The player who gets the most credit is Schilling who went out there and pitched his ass of with blood seeping through his sock, showing just the kind of heart the Yankees absolutly do not possess. The amazing thing is they won the game even with the Yankees BLATANTLY trying to cheat. In case you‘re a Yankee fan and you’re not quite sure of what I‘m talking about, in the eighth inning of game six the Yankees (being obviously frustrated with losing) started to almost get something going with an RBI base hit by Jeter, then A-rod grounded out and on his way to first he slapped the ball like a little girl out of Arroyo’s hand allowing Jeter to prance all the way home, on top of that A-rod never even touched first base once and started clapping his hands like a douche bag assuming he was safe!Francona was quick to dispute this and the umps called Rodriguez out and sent Jeter back to first; then those two fairies had the audacity to start crying like babies! The classless fans in the stadium wasted no time before they started being assholes too by throwing things at the players, which then incited the riot police to come out and keep the drunken freaks in order. Absolutely unbelievable… see you in game 7 New York.
Rivera Blows It, Pedro Will Save Us Now
The Red Sox just came within 3 outs of ending their season but they put a stop to it and scored a run Rivera, then extending the season one more day thanks to David Ortiz's 2-run walk off homer. Hey funny how after rumors started floating of the Yankees stealing signs from second base then the Red Sox are finally able to pull a win out of their ass... makes you wonder, huh? Don't give up hope yet!
JETER AND POSADA SPENT A NIGHT IN A STEAMROOM
 Well, the Yanks are up on the Sox 2-0 in the ALCS. But don't give up hope yet, the Red Sox will give the Yanks what they have coming to them back at Fenway. Anyway, I have just received some interesting news that could cheer up some of you Yankee haters. That news is: Jeter and Posada are gay. Wait, wait, don't just smirk this off as another petty "Jeter Swallows" joke, I have a SUPREME COURT TRANSCIPT given by a man named Paul Priore that describes his harrassment case against the Yankees and one (extremly funny and slightly disturbing) description of a night that Derek Jeter and Jorge Posada spent together in a steam room. CLICK HERE TO READ =)
Sox, Yanks Advance to ALCS
The ALCS will be starting soon and it will be between the Red Sox and YankeesIn recent Yankee sucking news, Giambi was left off of the postseason roster because of whatever the hell he has living in his stomach. That's a terrific way of spending $20 million a year Steinbrenner, Brian Cashman really is a genius... oh wait, he's actually clueless with a lot of dumb luck and a bottomless wallet to spend.In other news, the commissioner’s office decided not to fine Gary Sheffield for "unknowingly using a cream two years ago that contained illegal steroids." Let me just say this: WHAT THE HELL?! Can anyone seriously look at Sheffield and say that he didn't know that he was sticking steroids up his ass for 10 years and wasn't aware of it? Absolutely ridiculous, nice job Selig.Anyways, I recommend this article by Sean McAdam about how much better the Red Sox are than the Yankees. (Go Red Sox!)
Yankees Play Their Worst Game in Franchise History; Red Sox Pull to Within 3.5
Oh what a glorious day to hate the Yankees! Yes, last night the Yankees suffered a devastating 22-0 shut-out given to them by the Cleveland Indians, it was the worst loss in the 101 year-old franchise history and the worst shut-out in baseball since 1900."I thought I had good stuff coming into the game..." Said Yankee starter Javier Vazquez, AKA: "idiot." The loss last night along with the Red Sox victory brings the Yankees ever so closer to losing the AL East pennant, which so many brilliant New Yorkers considered a lock before the season was even half way over.
Many of the Yankees left the clubhouse before the reporters even had a chance to make fun of them for the news papers, however Jorge Posada commented: "it's obviously embarrassing." Though it was unclear whether he was referring to the game or his "closet relationship" with Derek Jeter.
Yankee's Lose Game By Mueller's Walk-off Home Run; A-rod Loses Dignity by Getting a Bitch-slap from Varitek. Fists were thrown in Fenway last night after Gay-rod, the $252 million dollar mistake, got a little full of himself and started whining about getting hit by a pitch... Aparently crying to Arroyo wasn't enough gratitude for him, so for some reason he thought he should pick a fight with Jason Varitek, one of the biggest players in baseball. It was obvious A-rod was confused and delerious, so Varitek, being the helpful guy that he is, decided to quickly knock some sense into him by shoving his fist into A-rod's face. While A-rod was learning a valuble lesson on why not to attack 6'2", 230 lb. guys wearing protective equipment, Tanyon Sturtze tried to put Gabe Kapler in a headlock. Sturtze then immediatly had the crap beat out of him by the Red Sox outfeilders and David Ortiz. After he emerged from the brawl, he had blood on his shirt and a boo-boo on his pinky which forced him to leave the game.The Yankees went into the 9th inning with a three run lead, but the Red Sox then decided to kick them while they were down and proceeded to win the game 11-10 thanks to Bill Mueller's walk off home run in the bottom of the 9th. Mariano Rivera got credit for the loss and blown save. The Yankees were forced to play the game without the help of their team's pansy mascott (AKA: Derek Jeter) who has some sort of hand injury, and Jason Giambi who is sidelined with lethargy. Hey Jason, maybe the lack of energy has something to do with the steroids no longer being constantly pumped into your ass?
News Flash: Posada Pees on himself"You don't want to shake my hand during spring training before practice." Says Jorge "sick freak" Posada.
Click here to read more about it.
Steroid Withdrawls Cause Early Season Slump for Yankee's SluggersWell the season is well underway, and I know most people are loving how the Yankee's new 22 million dollar per year third baseman is batting .172. What's even funnier is Giambi's weight, funny how he decided to take off a couple dozen pounds as soon as steroid testing began, isn't it?  And what an odd coincidence that his personal trainer was arrested with steroids and claimed they were being sold to Giambi and fellow Yankee Gary Sheffield. Oh and he's batting .227."My weight is almost exactly the same"," claimed Giambi. Yeah right, take a look at the pictures to the right, he's either withering away without his ass-injected candy or he's addicted to speed, either way I'm pretty sure he didn't sweat that off on the beach during the offseason.
Steinbrenner Panics, Then Gives his Employee's Dental Plan Cash to A-rod.As all of you must know by now, the Yankees once again attempted to buy a world championship / ruin competition in MLB by trading for Alex Rodriguez. First things first: A-rod is a greedy jackass.Now that that has been made clear, I'd like to point out some of the brighter side of this trade. Since Jeter and Rodriguez both play SS, Alex is being forced over to third base, which has caused some clubhouse controversy. It seems a bit weird for the highest paid player in baseball to move over in order to accommodate someone who would never get as big of a salary as him, "because he just doesn't do the power numbers and defensively he doesn't do all those things." Rodriguez later added a comment about his leadership skills: ""He's never had to lead. He can just go and play and have fun. He hits second -- that's totally different than third or fourth in a lineup." I wonder why Derek and Alex haven’t been "as tight" lately? Here's something else to ponder about from the Boston Globe in regards to Yankee clubhouse chemistry:
Rodriguez (told the Red Sox that) he intended to remain a shortstop. He also spent a considerable amount of time, in his conversations with the Sox, telling them how much he hated the Yankees, the industry source said. When Rodriguez first told Texas owner Tom Hicks he would waive his no-trade clause for two teams, the Yankees and Red Sox, he included the Yankees only to give Hicks, and himself, some leverage in dealing with the Sox."Some more hilarity in the big trade is how in the midst of focusing on the left side of the infield, the Yankees seemed to have overlooked the fact that their starting second baseman is now... Enrique Wilson. HAHAHA! | Skanks Payroll | | The Yankees' potential lineup with A-Rod, per inning based on 2004 salaries. | | Player | Dollars/9 innings | | 1. Kenny Lofton, CF | $2,126 | | 2. Derek Jeter, SS | $11,659 | | 3. Alex Rodriguez, 3B | $14,403 | | 4. Jason Giambi, 1B | $6,858 | | 5. Gary Sheffield, RF | $8,916 | | 6. Bernie Williams, DH | $8,230 | | 7. Jorge Posada, C | $4,115 | | 8. Hideki Matsui, LF | $4,801 | | 9. Enrique Wilson, 2B | $617 | | Kevin Brown, RHP | $10,288 | | Total | $72,013 | To put some numbers into perspective for many ignorant Yankee fans, Alfonso Soriano and Aaron Boone combined for 62 home runs, 187 RBI, and 58 stolen bases last season. Their replacements, A-rod and Wilson combined for 50 home runs, 135 RBI and 20 stolen bases. What an upgrade! And all it cost was raising the Yankee payroll up to a measly $186.7 million. Speaking of the Yankee payroll, check out the table to the right showing how much each Yankee starter makes per game:For more good anti-Yankee reading about this trade, check out Bill Simmons' latest article.
Yankee Hating listclick here to read it.Also, check out this new flash animation that gives the Yankees a special "good-bye" from the post-season.
Check Out Our Updated Yankee Hating Timeline!
Thanks to some user-submitted ideas, we now have a growing list of dates in Yankee Hating history! It has been recently updated. Click here to see it!
New Yankees Suck Song!
Click here to listen to the new punk song titled "Yankees Suck!" from the band Bender X.
Ban the Yankees
I recently received an email from someone endorsing a petition that has been started to ban the New York Yankees from baseball. I know this most likely won't happen, but it will be funny if the petition gets really popular, so click below to sign it if you want.Ban The Yanks
We have just received dozens of actual legal documents regarding criminal acts, restraining orders and more against past and present members of the New York Yankee organization. Click here to read them!
Three Months 'Till Opening Day
Well, it's been a while since the site got updated, and a lot has happened in baseball since the last World Series. In financial news, the Yankees are being forced to pay $60.62 million in revenue sharing and luxury taxes due to their absurd $158 million dollar payroll... in case you didn't know $60 million is more than what 13 different major league teams TOTAL payroll was last season, and more than TRIPLE the payroll of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays.
In transaction news, the Red Sox made a couple slick maneuvers in acquiring some quality players like Curt Schilling and Keith Foulke. Of course the Yankees panicked and replaced their entire starting pitching staff (except for Mike Mussina) and acquired 8 new players, including Kevin Brown, Javier Vazquez, Gary Sheffeild, and are strongly pursuing their new secret weapon... Tony "The Tiger" Clark (uh oh!).
In other news, the Yankees cut loose Karim Garcia a day after being charged with assult and battery charges. Ben Affleck had some words on this event:
"No, it wasn't. It was a Boston groundskeeper who teaches mentally disabled children, who's out there simply expressing his enthusiasm and supporting his home team. And he was assaulted -- viciously -- by Jeff Nelson and Karim Garcia and a number of men in the Yankees' bullpen, who kicked and stomped him. This is a man who gives his life for children who are in need. He's not some selfish, marginal ballplayer like Jeff Nelson or Karim Garcia. Garcia wants to talk about his career; it's a joke. If he's so worried about his career, why would he be getting in a fracas in the bullpen? Why would he be hitting .230, for that matter?
I thought it was just abominable. They attacked him. I know in that game, tempers were getting out of control and everything; but I just thought it was a shame. You can't attack somebody for rooting for a team. The man teaches retarded children. I would like to emphasize that."
Steinbrenner recently fainted and was hospitalized, that’s not quite so funny, but what is funny was him facing a subpoena in a lobbying probe.
Any who, my off-season vacation is pretty much over so I'll try and keep the anti-Yankee news coming more consistently from now on, so check back soon!
Rumble in the Fens
Holy Crap! As I'm sure most of you know, game three of the ALCS was just a little bit wild. To sum things up:
|  | | Pedro Martinez yells at Karim Garcia after hitting him with a pitch in the fourth inning. |
Pedro threw a pitch behind right fielder Karim Garcia's head and hit him in the back in the top of the fourth inning. Ok, shame on Pedro. Garcia retaliated the next inning by taking out second baseman Todd Walker with a vicious late slide. Not exactly the classiest thing to do, as the usual retaliation would be expected from the pitcher, but fair enough. Then Fatass Roger decides to go ahead and do that anyway by throwing a pitch at Manny Ramirez's head, to no one's surprise Manny was not the happiest person in the world.
The next thing you know, Don friggen Zimmer runs at Pedro Martinez like a domincan-hungry zombie, so Pedro threw him to the ground. He could have hurt him, but he just redirected him to the ground instead. YAnkee pitcher Jeff Nelson had this to say: "What, Pedro couldn't dodge him? The guy is 75 years old, how is he going to hurt you? You have to have more respect than that for someone like, an elderly man. You have to get out of the way."
What!? What the hell would you do if a 72-year old blob of skin was running at you with the intent to hit you in the face? If you ask me he's lucky Pedro didn't kick him in the gonads like he deserved. But I'm sure Mr. Nelson is way to classy to put some "innocent" person in the hospital, oh wait, too late. Yep, turns out Jeff Nelson and Karim Garcia (who aparently, after sliding into Todd Walker, had decided that he had not stabbed enough people with his cleat that game) are under police investigation for assaulting a member of the Red Sox grounds crew. Ironically, Mayor Bloomberg now wants Pedro arrested for throwing someone who tried to punch him in the face onto the ground. Meanwhile Nelson can't accept a groundskeeper swinging a rally towel to support the Red Sox (AT Fenway Park mind you) so he decides to get his buddy Karim Garcia and dig their cleats into his arm, back and face. Yep, real classy you Yankee idiots.
Newsflash: The Yankees Organization is Run by ASSHOLES
Yeah, as if you didn't already know. Ok, so I was sitting at home today minding my own buisness, when I recieved a "cease and desist" letter from Major League Baseball (more specifically, the New York Yankees). They claimed that my 'Yankees Suck' shirts were "infringing on their intellectual copyright properties" and demanded that I stop selling them. Luckily for me, I'm not an idiot, and I'm quite certain that the word "Yankees" is not, and can not be copyrighted by anyone (my lawyer will back me up on this one).
Anyway, nice try Steinbrenner, but I think I'll keep selling them, and I hope for every shirt that I sell you go ahead and waste more money paying lawyers to send a college student like myself empty-threat BS emails, with an improbable hope that I stop making fun of your billion-dollar joke of a franchise (who by the way were humiliated by the Red Sox in game 1 of the ALCS last night), oh and my buddy Chad has a message for you:
Yanks No-Hit At The Stadium!! |  | | The Astro's celebrate their Yankee beating. |
On Wednesday, June 11, 2003, six Houston Astros pitchers (Roy Oswalt, Pete Munro, Kirk Saarloos, Brad Lidge, Octavio Dotel and Billy Wagner) combined to no hit the Yankees for the first time in 45 years. "Tonight was an ugly, ugly performance," said Yankee manager Joe Torre. As if that wasn't funny enough, the Yankees struck out four times in the eigth inning!
To add insult to injury the loss put the Yankees in second place behind the Boston Red Sox.
ESPN's Jim Caple has written an awesome article to commemorate the event.
Rogah Makes bid for 300th Win vs. Red Sox
So, I've been getting a lot of emails asking "Even though you are a Red Sox fan, will you be cheering for Roger to get his 300th win?"
Hmm, let me think. Well, I root for the Red Sox to win every game they play, and similarly I root for the Yankees to lose every game they play. On top of that, I never root for the man I dispise more than anyone on the planet (Roger Clemens), becuase he is the Anti-Christ. Now on top of that, Roger, who plays for the Yankees, is pitching against the Red Sox, and trying to make history against the team (my team) he deserted years ago with no remorse, while we are 1.5 games ahead of them in a pennant race. So the answer is yeah, I'll be rooting for him all right. And in case you didn't pick up the sarcasm on that, maybe you should be out fixing up your trailor instead of reading this web page. DON'T ROOT FOR ROGAH!
Update: Yankees in Second Place... Bernie's Knee Goes Boom; Contreas Biggest Bust in History
It's May 26 (Memorial Day) and the second place Yankees are hosting the first place Boston Red Sox today. Meanwhile in Yankee Hater news Bernie Williams is going in for knee surgery soon and is expected to be out 6 weeks.
As if that isn't good enough, Jose Contreas (the supposed Cuban "Ace") who is currently signed to a four-year $32 Million deal was really impressing all of his coaches... in the minor leagues. But unfortunatly for him in the Majors he is 1-1 with an 8.74 ERA in 8 appearences.
Driven to distraction, Yankees wobble toward opening day
"Though a newcomer to New York, Tom Glavine is a quick study. So it's no wonder the nonstop, kooky news coming out of Yankeeland caught his attention. "
Click here to have a good laugh at all of the recent Yankee misfortunes.
Yankees Ensure 2003 Pennant By Signing Every Player In Baseball
NEW YORK--With a week to go before pitchers and catchers report for spring training, the New York Yankees shored up their pitching, hitting, and defense Monday by signing every player in professional baseball.
Yes it's fake, but it's funny! Thanks to The Onion! Also check out Scott Gleason's newest article.
Lucchino strikes at 'evil empire'
This week, while spitting in the face of the new luxery tax by brinin payroll up to nearly $160 million, the Yankees and Cuban defector Contreras agreed to a four-year contract Dec. 24 worth $32 million. After the agreement had been reached, Lucchino initially offered a brusque "no comment" when reached by The New York Times. Then he pulled a 180 with his position. "No, I'll make a comment. The evil empire extends its tentacles even into Latin America," Lucchino told The Times. Click here for the full story.
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And as it pains the rest of baseball to see the Yankees sign the cuban "prized pitcher", some consolodation for you all is that there is no way in hell this man is 31 years old:
Showin' them who's Boss
Jim Caple recently wrote an article in reguards to Steinbrenner's brilliant new plan to screw over the real workers in the Yankees organization by eliminating dental insurance for his off-the-field employees, a move estimated to save the team $100,000 (1/5 the total cost of a major league player making the league minimum). Click here.
Clemens Back in Boston..."My Big Fat Nightmare"
Bill Simmons (AKA" the great "Boston Sports Guy") recenetly wrote an article for ESPN which explains exactly why everyone in Boston should shudder in disgust at the idea of Roger Clemens possibly returning to Boston this offseason, click here to read it.
Also click here to see something you can't help but laugh at.
"F#@! the Yankees!"
"Kent deal to Yanks unlikely, judging by Sabean's words. Regarding the latest Yankees trade rumor, Giants General Manager Brian Sabean had a message for his friends in New York.
``Screw the Yankees,'' Sabean said, although his verb choice was significantly more colorful. ``Are they supposed to get everyone in baseball?''"
Click here to read the article.
Thank You
I would like to thank Dino Costa from SportsRadio 1560 WATJ in Cleveland for taking the time to have me on his show recently. He invited me on to talk about the website and let all the Yankee haters in Cleveland about it, because Cleveland fans hate the Yanks too!
The effort he made to get us on the show was greatly appreciated. His show airs from 3 to 6 PM, if you are in the area, make sure you tune in and listen to Dino, the leader of the Yankee hating circuit in the Cleveland!
Our "Yankees Suck" Shirts have been un-banned in Safeco Field
After the recent controversies involving our "Yankees Suck" being banned from Safeco Field, the Mariners have decided not to enforce the ban for now. This is good news for all the Seattle Yankee haters!
The Yankees said Monday they had no comment.
Many thanks go out to all the dedicated Mariner fans who support our website, and movement against the Yankees.
-ESPN Page 2 columnist Jim Caple has written an article about the recent banning of our shirts in Safeco.
Two Morons... One Baseball Team
  Everyone's favorite drug addicted idiot and over hyped 28 year old "prospect" both got in trouble this week...and on the same day!
Outfielder Ruben Rivera was kicked off the Yankees for >stealing Derek Jeter's glove
In Other Yankee news, Strawberry celebrated his 40th birthday while being arrested once again for >breaking a rule at the drug treatment center where he had been serving two years of house arrest.
THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA YANKEES LOSE!
Check out this flash animation commemorating the Yankees' loss in the 2001 World Series, and another that shows why they suck.
Raja Injures Foot, Pride in 8-0 Loss Vs. Mets
 Most of us expected to watch this Saturday's game between the Yanks and Mets at Shea Stadium to see Shawn Estes injure Roger Clemens with a pitch in retaliation for past incidents between Clemens and Piazza.
Estes did throw at Roger.. and missed, before getting warned by the umpire. However Estes managed did manage to hit Roger later in the game, when he connected for a 2-run homer to take the lead. Piazza also homered. Roger, (now 8-3 with a 3.73 ERA) then proceeded to fake a foot injury and pleaded with Torre to take him out of the game.
Rivera is human after all
Last year Yankee closer Mariano Rivera showed signs that he is actually human when he blew the world series against Arizona. He is continuing the trend this year, when he gave up an 8th inning game winning 2-run home run to Red Sox third baseman Shea Hillenbrand as they went on to beat the Yankees 7-6. Rivera sat by himself in the dugout and threw his hands in the air. The next day Rivera showed some real Yankee class when he again faced Hillenbrand.. and threw a fast ball at his head.
Yankees Upset with Andy
"The ONLY time I will ever stick up for Andy Pettitte. And it's only because he's going against the Yankees...
If I were Pettitte I'd tell them if they ever asked about my kids again, I'd tattoo the met logo on my (butt) so they could kiss it. No facial hair, no Mets caps on children...just like the faceless, impersonal greedy organization they are."
-Mr. T.
>Click here to read about it.
Manny Press Conference Video
 Red Sox news conference
 Manny Ramirez joins the Red Sox and is "tired of seeing New York always win."
RealVideo: | 28.8
RealPlayer available below. Video Courtesy of espn.com
Fan summits Everest, burns Yankee cap
Click here to read about a Red Sox fan/mountain climber's attempt to break the curse of the Bambino.
Rocker Attacks Yankee Fan
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| Rocker |
A Yankee Fan filed a complaint of verbal harrassment against John Rocker after the Atlanta Braves pitcher allegedly chased the man around a New Jersey bar last weekend. Click here to read about it.
Is Roger Clemens really the Antichrist?
Bill Simmons: "My bosses at Page 2 gave me a simple assignment this week: "Please explain to the world why Boston fans believe that Roger Clemens might be the Antichrist." Click here to read about it.
Yankees Place Cuban Defect Andy Moralas on Waivers
Don't you just love to see the Yankees throwing around money? Yes, Cuban Defect Andy Morales (remeber him, the guy the yanks out-bid the sox for in the offseason) was just released by the team. Click here to read about it.
Straw In Trouble Again
It appears that Darryl Strawberry is in trouble once again. Strawberry yesterday violated the terms of his parole by walking out of a medical clinic where he was to have a chemotherapy session. A warrant was subsequenly issued for his arrest. The NY Post reports that friends say Strawberry was depressed over chemotherapy treatments for colon cancer that have left him sick for days. Joe Papy, the regional director of the Florida Dept. of Corrections, said Strawberry was in violation of parole the moment he stepped off the grounds of the Health Care Connections clinic. The AP reports that officials were alerted by Strawberry's personal monitoring device. As of this morning Strawberry was still missing and is considered a fugitive.
Jeter is a Bad Shortstop
Click here to read an article from espn.com that explains how Nomar and A-Rod are better than Jeter.
The Geat Eight Free Agents of 2000-2001
Click on the link below to see a page from ESPN.com about where the greatest eight free agents in baseball will be going in 2001.
The Great 8: Where they're headed
Funny Shite
Click here to read an article from msncb.com that's pretty funny. It is a bit offending to any fan of any team, but I thought it is still funny enough to be published here.
New non-Yankee Relted free agent signings
Click here to read about howA-Rod is now the highest payed baseball player ever, but even more importantly, click here to read how we (the sox) got Manny!
Rumblings And Grumblings
Click here to read the storyfrom ESPN.com about how the Yankees havn't won the 2001 World Series yet.
How the Yanks Win
Just take a gander at the MLB payroll
Yankee Site Hacked
Hehehe, click here to read the story.
Daryl did it again
Click here to read up on Strawberry's latest incident; We try to feel sorry for a guy with cancer, but he just makes it so hard.
Two words: YOU IDIOT!
Click here to read an article from MSN.com about the latest news of
Roger's brilliant actions and his ingenius cover-up... "It was an accident". Thats very believable, I mean just look at how innocent little Roger looks...
Articles from MSN.com about the Yanks and why they won't win
Why The Yankees Won't Win the World Series
Odds against the Yankees Winning
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